Saturday, January 21, 2006
I shall not attempt to speak about life these days in this entry in detail. All you need to know is that I had been quite busy the last few days and finally I have a few days of rest during the weekend. But it is pretty bad because I think my body has this automatic mechanism in me - whenever I don't need to work I just fall sick. Anyway, on to today's little topic... not quite, let me give some background information first.
My computer has been going absofxckinglutely insane these days... and I'm trying very hard to delete stuff I don't want and transfer useful stuff to my hard drive. Pretty interesting task to just sift through some old stuff like photos and old journal entries... It is sort of like room cleaning, for my computer.
So I was just reading some of the old journal entries from when I first entered university and sort of compared them as time went by... I do notice quite a big change. I felt like I turned from this bubbly, optimistic, happy person... to this really dull person. I guess the worst part is NOT even bothering to write anything onto blog. In the past, I used to record things and what I did in my blogs. It was pretty nice when you want to read back and re-live a certain event. These days I just feel like at such a loss for words so I don't even bother writing anything down.
Why is there such a huge change from a bubbly person to this seriously dull person? I think I am turning old. But more than being old, going through things, you feel that there aren't as much stuff to be happy about. Also the older you get the more responsibilities and obligations you have. You are no longer a child which has everything taken care for you. It is time to step up and actually do something for yourself. It feels extremely frustrating when you haven't really done anything for yourself. It really does. I don't want to spend much time here ranting on how bleak the future is or that sort of stuff. That's not the point in my entry.
Basically what I really wish now to do is to really think less, especially things that is not within my control. I know I will have to work hard still, but I will have to worry less. Also I have to learn to be thankful of things around me. They're not at all bad, but I don't see the good side to thing. I am such a pessimist at times. It's really a bad habit I will have to put away... but hopefully I can work towards that.
meg @ 1/21/2006 12:26:00 AM |
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Monday, January 02, 2006
Happy New Year from my semi-dormant blog.
Happy injunction New Year, Happy injunction Birthday... lalalala~
Sometimes I think my feelings are getting more and more complicated. The older you are, more stuff you're faced with, more troubles are prone... but time just simply does not wait for the person to adjust to changes. At times I just feel SO stupid!
Also I'm told... that I'm a very serious person. I gave some thoughts about it. I think I am quite serious to certain things, upholding to certain standards, and sometimes I just feel so helpless and frustrated if things don't work. Why am I adopting such stringent standards to myself? Because you only live once - and one can't afford too many screw-ups.
So this year - although adopting a high standard is a good thing, I will have to learn to let go of my worries and try to live happier even though life sucks at times.
I just want to find a good direction and be happy.
meg @ 1/02/2006 10:26:00 PM |
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Sunday, December 18, 2005
It's been officially ages since I've done any updates on blog. I'm sure no one would have noticed anyway (sad...)
I've been kept pretty busy from school, and occasionally writing crazy babbles on xanga which do not really address what I am feeling.
Honestly - I'm pretty stressed lately. Not that I specially stress myself out or anything, but my body is just screaming at me because of inherent stress. I'm having a sore throat right now to make things worse.
My life during exams... nothing remotely interesting as box files, papers, books and tea are my best friends these days. There is an interesting phenomenon when you find stupid flash games online insanely addictive during exams. Procrastination just screams at your face.
School's tough. The teachers ain't any better especially those large group lectures. I just hate it when they disguise their incompetentness with excuses like students have to self learn. If we could self learn, why the hell do we need to pay all that tuition fees to go to school? There are some small group teachers who do teach and do a good job at it, but when those who are running it insist on some screwed up ideas of self learning... it's pathetic. Example of self learning is to make us students to do an assignment that we have zero idea about, making us feel depressed and worthless, then finally to teach us how to do that task properly. What the hell is wrong with those teachers? It's like drowning all the students in the sea and then scooping up the dead bodies afterwards.
That's the point of today. I think I will write more later... and of course a small comment on the WTO incident in Hong Kong these days.
Until later. x
meg @ 12/18/2005 09:42:00 PM |
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Friday, September 16, 2005
Big picture...
I hope I can see more of that sometime soon...
Thank you for letting me rant on.
meg @ 9/16/2005 10:19:00 PM |
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Tuesday, September 13, 2005
Depressing... even though it's only the first week of school...
Seems like not much of a life this year, with the inhumane amount of work and the hellish schedules.
I really hope that I will be able to find something... to "make a difference", as I do every single year.
Just have to hang in there... and I think I have to say "hang in there" to the mysterious and evil person all the way in Germany who is going through one hell of a year too.
Look forward to the end of this course already. Gosh.
meg @ 9/13/2005 09:16:00 PM |
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Thursday, September 08, 2005
A new beginning.
A new era.
Just have to start getting used to this new way of life eh?
meg @ 9/08/2005 10:12:00 PM |
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Saturday, September 03, 2005
I really haven't done this in a long time... as in really sitting in front of my computer writing a blog entry. I guess the blog deserves an entry after such a long period of absence.
The summer is finally drawing a close. Before the summer I was actually going crazy figuring out what I would do over the summer/not wasting the potentially last summer vacation/and all the rest. It is just so me that I worry about every bit of thing in my life. I really have much more than I bargained for - an internship, a summer program, new friends, old friends, fun, parties, gatherings... and to make things all the "better", I got sick the last week of summer.
Finally after that horrible ordeal with the faculty re late examinations and such, I am also very pleased to know that I will be going back to school for PCLL classes.
This last week has been pretty devastating for me - as in bored to hell at home with nothing much to do and can't even speak because of my super sore throat. I managed to finish two seasons of the O.C. as well as the first season of Desperate Housewives because all I can really do at home is to nap (and no the nap rays play NO part in this now, when study season is not around) and to watch television. I just can't stand my life being too idle. Maybe why I got sick is because I was too idle!
Anyway. September now. Time to put away things. Put away the DVDs, the junk accumulated in my room over the summer, etc. etc. Time to focus on the new school year, a new course, a new beginning, kick a few more asses here and there... The end of the summer is not the end to all the craziness... it's only the beginning to even more mayhem. Surprise, surprise. I'm actually looking forward to it. (I guess getting sick really makes you also sick in the head eh?)
Time to worry over a new topic. hahahaha.
Also, this year is definitely a time for change for many of my good friends and you guys know who you are. No matter whether you're still studying, working, or figuring out what you want to do in your lives. I wish you all the best.
meg @ 9/03/2005 05:54:00 PM |
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Sunday, August 28, 2005
A lesson in professional ethics, or lack thereof.
Everyone should adhere to some sort of ethical standards in regards to life. It is even more important that certain professionals such as doctors, lawyers or accountants to be even more ethical in their behavior. Anyway, I will share an incident which will show that certain doctor and nurses are completely unethical.
Unfortunately I caught a cold and so I planned to go see a doctor today. It is a Sunday and the opening hours are until 1pm (and the clinic will reopen again at 4pm). I got to the doctor's office before 1pm so I thought I could see the doctor. So when I told the nurse that I want to see the doctor, she said that the clinic is closed and that I have to return at 4. It's pretty out of the question for me to wait until 4 and I was feeling a bit drowsy and stuff, so my mom spoke to those nurses demanding that I get to see the doctor since I have arrived before 1! The nurses said that it's the doctor's problem that he is not going to take anymore patients... so my mom demanded to speak to the doctor...
After waiting for 10 minutes or so... the doctor reluctantly agreed to see me. Once in the doctor's room the doctor seemed very impatient and although my mom nicely said to the doctor "sorry for keeping you late", the doctor was pretty rude and abrasive and told my mom that you should apologize to the nurses.
After like 3 minutes of seeing the doctor, you see that doctor happily skipping out of the clinic. Now you see the point that there is a lack of professional ethics when the nurses blame the doctor and the doctor blames the nurses.
Extremely pissing off for someone who's sick like myself. If it wasn't the only doctor available in that area, I would definitely not go there.
What do you think about this? Are there other incidents of professionals acting without ethics that you have encountered?
meg @ 8/28/2005 03:12:00 PM |
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Saturday, August 06, 2005
Yay I got my iPod back and it is a new one!!!
Now I am at home... preparing for my last exam...
Have to work really really hard and hang in there for a few more days.
meg @ 8/06/2005 06:54:00 PM |
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Monday, August 01, 2005
I think I'm living my life backwards... it's only now that I'm experiencing the "American-style" college life...
Apart from the LKF-ing...
A group of us "apes" went to Stanley Beach for a lovely afternoon...
Will write details later with photo captions yeah! :)
meg @ 8/01/2005 10:31:00 PM |
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Tuesday, July 26, 2005
happiness is... :)
meg @ 7/26/2005 10:24:00 PM |
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Saturday, July 23, 2005
So having heard about my iPod, M said to me "are you missing your ipod already? i couldnt live without one, even if it was only a week or so =)"
I have to say... without that music on public transportation (when it's noisy, crowded and hot) ... I'm missing my iPod very much.
meg @ 7/23/2005 07:19:00 PM |
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Thursday, July 21, 2005
Got quite a bit of things done this morning and running some errands...
Then yoga class...
Then lunch with PD and some other summer students at Zen... Then going back to chambers just to say hi to people there... it feels a bit strange as it is place where I have spent my last month or so there, and not going there for a few days, and back to make a round... hmm...
Then hung around with K around Causeway... we actually wanted to watch Madagascar... but pretty disappointed that all cinemas in that area only have the Cantonese dub... grrr... Also got my iPod (finally) to fix... because my Pod lost its backlight... hope they'll replace me with a new one ;)
Then went to APM to meet up my parents for dinner... that restaurant forgotten to order one of our dishes... so we didn't quite finish up dinner there, and went back to Tai Po for a lovely bowl of wonton noodles :)
Pretty much my day...
Now back to studying.
meg @ 7/21/2005 09:13:00 PM |
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Wednesday, July 20, 2005
Counting down.
Evidence to be examed on August 9th, but because of AIPE, I only have a week or so to get everything into order. If it's any other exam, I would worry much less. But evidence has left some sort of a dark mark on me...
Stressful... but really can't complain too much. I somehow chose to participate in all this stuff (ISC in May, working earlier on and now AIPE in August). Now it's pay back time.
Karma bites... no?
I just need support now.
My head is also really stiff these days... need a massage >_<
meg @ 7/20/2005 06:17:00 PM |
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Monday, July 18, 2005
I declare war.
Losing is NOT an option.
meg @ 7/18/2005 11:05:00 AM |
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